I hate steam too.
I have set it so it DOESNT ''open on startup'' because it hogs processor and ram even when Im not using it and I dont like the way steam games install... I wanna SEE an installation in my program files and know exactly where my exe is on my hard disk... I also hate ''cloud'' which saves games on steam's server and not your hardisk.
Nowadays I actually pull my ethernet cable (im not wireless) out before running steam games because I DONT WANT to be connected to a big brother program that can read my disk.
Steam actually takes up very little resources. If your copy is hogging your processor and RAM, especially when not using it, then there's something wrong on your end. Also, if it's still loading when you've set it not to load on start up then it's, again, a problem on your end. Mine doesn't didn't start up automatically when I set it not to.
Steam stores the installation folders of all of your Steam-purchased/run games in one single location, that being C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\. It may be slightly different depending on your Windows installation.
Steam doesn't store your saves on the Cloud only, they're saved on your hard drive. It just uploads them to the Cloud which are then re-downloaded should you run your game on another machine, and/or re-install it on your own. The saves locations actually depend on the games themselves, not Steam. They could be located in a folder under the games name in My Documents, or My Documents\My Games\, or even in the games installation folder. You can also disable the use of the Steam Cloud if you take a look at the Settings.
And the last point. If you don't like Steam always having access to the internet (and unplugging your cable is a little excessive), then set up your Firewall so that it doesn't automatically allow access. That way you'll be informed when Steam is trying to access the internet, and you can either block or allow it. Also, as a side note, technically any program you install on your hard disk has access to it and all of the files contained there. Including Windows.
[Edited by Skyheart, 11/20/2011 6:49:55 AM]
congratulations you are now anti-steam-troll 10 trillion you won your self "i talk crap" t-shirt. seriously if you hate steam so much dont use it. problem solved.
10 trillion and 1. Do i get a tshirt too?